We Have a Choice Each Day

Episode 51
August 16, 2022
We Have a Choice Each Day

Through her book and through her music, Melissa Bollea Rowe is sharing personal stories and reflects on the powerful effect that the three words God, Gratitude, and Giving have on her daily life and hopes that it will offer a new perspective reminding others that we do have the choice each day as to what we put our time and energy into.

Here are some important moments with Melissa from the podcast: 

At 9:51  Melissa talks about her struggles after moving to Nashville, and how she overcame it.

At 16:50 What kind of reaction do you get from people when they hear the messages in your songs?

At 23:17 Melissa talks about her song Sweet Honesty and the inspiration behind it.

Here are some ways to follow and contact Melissa:

Website: https://melissabollearowe.com

 Link to buy Melissa’s book: https://amzn.to/3CghEtl

 Instagram: https://instagram.com/rhymepartners

 Melissa’s Instagram: https://instagram.com/melissa_bollea_rowe

 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/rhymepartners

 Twitter: https://twitter.com/rhymepartners

Important information from Homeowners Be Aware:

Here are ways you can follow us on-line:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/homeownersbeaware/

Website: https://homeownersbeaware.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/george-siegal/

If you'd like to reach me for any reason, here's the link to my contact form:

https://homeownersbeaware.com/contact

Here's the link to the trailer for the documentary film I'm making: Built to Last: Buyer Beware.

🎧 If you enjoyed this episode, don't keep it to yourself! Share it with your friends and help spread the knowledge. Remember to hit the like button, subscribe for more insightful content, and leave a review to let us know your thoughts. Your support means the world to us! 🌟

Thanks for listening!

Transcript

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 0:00

To the scent of that perfume those memories all at once fill my hear with love, oh, the most precious gift she ever gave to me, a little pink bottle of sweet honesty.. Sweet honesty. So, you know, always in songwriting and always in songs. The whole thing is there's a lot of times where you are telling a story that is, you know, the details of it might be a little personal, but typically what you want is the universal message to come across.

George Siegal: 0:41

I'm George Siegal. And this is the Tell Us How to Make It Better podcast. Every week, we introduce you to people who are working on real world problems and providing actual solutions. Tell Us How to Make It Better is partnering with The Readiness Lab, the home for podcasts, webinars, and training in the field of emergency and disaster services. Hi everybody. Thank you so much for joining me on this week's Tell Us How to Make It Better podcast. I just got a notification recently from buzz sprout, where we host our podcast. That we had done our 50th episode and, and they kind of make a big deal out of it by giving you a graphic that says 50 episodes. I guess most people stop after just doing a handful. So 50 is supposed to be a pretty good accomplishment. And I wanna thank everybody. Who's taken the time to listen. What I try to do each week on this podcast is introduce you to somebody who has identified a problem and is doing something to try to make it better. We've had a variety of different guests on here ranging from people that are concerned about the environment, people for healthy eating, motivational speakers, but there's also another way to make a difference. And that's what my guest today is going to talk about as she is trying to make a difference in people's lives, through her music and through a book she's just written. My guest today is Melissa Bollea Rowe. She's a professional songwriter of 15 plus years, a published author and founder and CEO of the music publishing and artist development company, Rhyme Partners, which she started in 2013. Her most recent publication as an author is her book, God Gratitude and Giving, which was released in May of this year. Melissa, thank you so much for coming on today.

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 2:16

Thank you for having me. I'm a big fan of your podcast and I'm honored to be here.

George Siegal: 2:21

Well, that's very nice of you to say now I, as I was learning a little bit about you, it made me curious before we start getting into what we're really on here to talk about. Is there a specific artist or musician or some talent that when you were a kid you looked at and said, I want to get into that business. Cause because you admired them or you thought they were really good?

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 2:38

So I don't know if I admired them or thought they were really good, but their music really affected me. And so I guess it was that, that it touched a place in me that was already familiar with my soul in terms of what my calling would be. And so I distinctly remember and funny that you asked this question because on top of the things we're gonna talk about I'm actually part of another book called the musical imprint, where we have invited authors to share stories about songs that mark a moment in their life. And every time they hear that song, they go right back to that memory. So that answers this question. That, that is the answer to your question. Lionel Richie is one of those, one of those artists for me as a writer I always felt like he was extremely vulnerable and, but yet strong and honest in his music. And when I was a little girl I lost my mother and I was sitting in the back seat of my uncle's car and he had to drive to the hospital. Waiting to find out if she was gonna make it. And that song his song three times a lady came on the radio and I felt that song very deeply. Of course in my little mind, I thought that song was about my mother as I grew up. I learned obviously that that was a love song, but that's the power of music. And so yes, there are certain artists that affected me that way when I was little.

George Siegal: 4:06

He's great. I saw him in concert in, in Los Angeles one time and just every, every song is hit after hit with that guy and the songs are so good.

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 4:14

Yes. I got to see him in concert too. Not too long ago.

George Siegal: 4:18

All right. And if you had to go out and do something fun, you had a day of just fun for you. What would, what would your day consist of? What would you go do?

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 4:24

Fun for me would just be exploring new places, I guess. You know, I'm, I've, I'm very much stay really, really busy. So when I can, I like to be out in nature. I love anything to do with getting out and exercising and walking or exploring beautiful things. I'm a little bit in awe of the world that we live in to be very honest with you without being really quirky. And so a sunset, an ocean a mountain, take me to it and that's, that's what I like to do.

George Siegal: 4:54

All right. So what problem or issue have you been working on and, and what are you doing to try to make it better?

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 5:04

Well in my little corner of the world over here, how I'm trying to make things better for people these days is I guess I'll just use the word pause. I recently put out my book, God gratitude and giving that you mentioned, and that has been something that's actually been on my heart for many, many years. And it was, it's a story about my journey in Nashville and how things got really rough and. You know, you just, all of. Most of us come to music city and we're like, okay, we're gonna go, we're gonna do this. And we find out, oops, it's really hard, probably same in the acting world or just anything, you know, that we're going after in life. So anyway, during my, you know, on my journey here, I hit some really low places. And one day I was in my quiet time, my meditation, whatever you'll call it. And those three words were presented to me. And it was really interesting, George, because I knew instantly the message of my heart was that if I would focus daily on God gratitude and giving, I would have no room for the usual worry, fear, anxiety, or depression of the things that I was focusing on. And so I back then. So this was about 10 years ago when that happened to me for me and I talk about this in my book for me, the, the, the God part of it was where the place I would go to feel like I was having that unique experience, my experience with God. And for me, that was silence. And so my days consisted of really carving out time to just be still, to just be silent, to just be able to sort out those, what we sometimes call confusion, you know, bring clarity to confusion. And then the gratitude part was just being grateful for things and making a conscious effort to be grateful and then giving finding ways to give. And they didn't always have to be monetary, although they could sometimes be. But one of my favorite things I talk about in my book is that I love to send a silent prayer to a stranger. And I even joke in my book about that, because I say, you know, , you gotta be real careful sometimes when you are looking at a stranger or maybe sending them a prayer because 99% of the time, they're not gonna think gee, I bet that person's praying for me. They're probably thinking why is she staring at me or something like that. But anyway, so in my book, I talk about these things. There's more than one way to give. And so I just got to a point where I was ready to share this. We are just in such a climate right now where we could use a little bit of good news. And I don't know if that's, you know, good news is gonna be for everybody, but I just know that if we all You know, if we all have something to give, we all have some value, I'm sure of it. And we're all good at something. And so I, that is my offering right now. Is that giving people something else to possibly focus on.

George Siegal: 7:53

Now, how old were you when you moved to Nashville or did you grow up? I mean, did you just go there by yourself and say, I'm gonna carve out a career? Did you grow up there?

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 8:00

I did not. So I'm originally from Florida. I grew up in Florida, lost both my parents when I was little, I had a bit of a rough start. You know, just it's, it's not woe is me. It's just, what is, it's just the truth of my story. I have one son, his name is Chad and I had him really young and I distinctly remember feeling knowing early on what my gift was. I could hear lyric and melody my entire life. Now, I didn't know that songwriting was a career. I can tell you that when I was a teenager. And then when I graduated school and then, and then a couple years after that I had my son. So I was very conscientious of the fact that I wasn't gonna make a move to Nashville when I finally figured out that I needed to get to a music city, whether that be New York, Nashville, you know, LA I needed to be in that community, but I made a very conscious decision that I wasn't going to take my son from, you know, my family, his father, my sister, everybody that loved him. I, I was. Just in my mind, I was like, it'd be very selfish for me to just pick up and move to Nashville. So I actually waited and being that I had him young by the time he was a senior in high school, I was in my mid thirties and that's when I moved to Nashville, Tennessee. So I was kind of a little bit behind in terms of, you know, these days kids just come right here and this is their college career instead of going to college, you know, some of them do move here for college, cuz there's some great universities here, Belmont and Vanderbilt in Murphysboro. There's some great universities here, but that's my story. I got here a little bit late, but I made it happen.

George Siegal: 9:33

So, yeah. And, and that's a huge sacrifice to not uproot your child and put, put him in that kind of environment. So congratulations to you on that, but you still had a rough time when you got there, it sounded like, I mean enough to inspire a book. I did. Go ahead. Can you touch on any of that? Just, I mean, I don't want to, you know, it's in the book.

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 9:51

I don't mind. I mean, I don't, Hey, I've got nothing to hide, just, you know, about transparency. But yeah, well, I had made a decision that because I, it had taken me so long to get there and to chase my dream. I sort of made this decision that I would not do anything unless it was somehow involved in the music business. So I just kind of. Silly me thought, well, it's not gonna be that hard to get a job in the industry. Well, it, it actually was, you know, I was, so I wanted this so much. It, it makes me emotional to talk about it, but I wanted it so much that it just didn't wanna get distracted with you know, a waitressing job or something like that, even though, you know, I didn't realize then that. You're gonna be in music city. So it's okay. If you're a waitress in music city, you're still gonna be around the music world. You're still gonna get to do your music. But I just had this thing in my head that I wasn't gonna do anything unless it was related to music. And so I had gone into a temp agency and I went in there and I sat down and I was like, I need to make this much money. And I wanna work in the music industry and here are my skills. And I remember her looking at me and saying, honey, You know what I've got like 200 students ahead of you. Why would I bump you in front of them? You know, they've all been waiting. And so don't hold out for that, but I will probably call you for another job. And I remember feeling really down about that. And then months went by and she didn't call me for anything and I was really running outta money running out of time. And I was getting ready to go take a waitressing job. and I kid you not George. It's a true story. We have a, we had a PF Changs on Weston Broadway in Nashville, and I was gonna go start my first day and I was feeling two ways about it. I was depressed because I was doing something other than music, but I was happy because I was probably gonna go home that night with some hostess tips or something, and I needed the money, but I kid you not. I get almost to the restaurant and I see nothing but fire trucks everywhere and the roads are blocked off and PF Changs that day, the kitchen had caught on fire. I never started that job. I went back home. I was really nervous about it, but I was also like, okay. I, I think I was just in, I was just still, I didn't know what, what was gonna happen at that point. The next morning, the temp agency called me, and this is what they said. Do not get your hopes up. This is only for three days, but there's an opening at great American country, which was the big video network, the country music video network, which is owned by scripts networks that owns HGTV and all the big shows. And they said their office manager needs to be out for three days. And so that's it. And I said, okay. And I was super excited. I hung up. I went and I had a moment with God and I said, I don't know how to turn three days into years, but with your help, I'm gonna do that. And I, I did just that, yes, I ended up working great American country for several years and I cultivated lots of relationships and I really got an inside view of the industry. I actually had a very unique view because while I worked in the industry, I was also with all my friends on the outside of the industry, you know, getting off work and hustling it and going to a show at night or writing, you know.

George Siegal: 13:13

Now, is there a moment you can look at and say that that's obviously a great moment. Is there, it's also seems like such a cutthroat business where you can deal with people that have bad intentions or wanna take advantage of you. Did you deal with much of that there?

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 13:28

I dealt with all of that. I dealt with all of that and , it was funny because when the whole big me too movement came about , I'm sorry, I'm laughing. But I just thought to myself, oh, there's definitely a few people wondering right now, you know If someone's gonna speak up about that, but it's like that in every single industry, it was discouraging for me. I felt very discouraged by it. And without, you know, naming anyone, there was one particular incident, one pretty big executive that it got to the point where initially I was finding ways to, you know, get, you know, get out of a situation. But there came a time where I actually had to defend myself and I knew that. Just really burning that bridge. And I had to be okay with that. And then I was. And I knew that that person would probably never do anything for me. And he was a pretty big deal. And he has never done anything for me and, you know, but it's all good, you know, I'm I'm of the mindset that what's for you won't go by you and I'm just, you know, no is just the first answer. You, you have to just feel that way you have to, or it's just an answer. It doesn't define you, you know, there's so much going on in this town. And I, I believe that there is opportunity everywhere and I've found opportunities and I've been so blessed and we all have a different success story. We all have a different definition of success. You know, I can't tell you that I have Garth Brooks, number one, hit for, you know, 15 weeks solid. But I can tell you that I wrote the entire musical recently called Speak Life In Bullying.. And they turned every one of my songs into a curriculum in schools called lyrics to life. And does that mean more to me? Would I trade if someone asked me if I wanted to trade, I would never. In a million years. Those that means the world to me. I'm actually every day I wake up and I think to myself, I can't believe you chose me God to write this musical, cuz it's a big deal. I mean it's in schools all over the nation and that's a big deal to me. But I ha I did have a single with Garth's daughter so that's pretty neat. You know, I, I

George Siegal: 15:46

Are there any other big, are there any other big celebrities or anybody that you've written a song for that, that, that we will know about?

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 15:51

I, I think so. Pretty cool. Like do you remember the nine days band? You probably remember their song? This is the story of a girl crowd, a river and town, the whole world.

George Siegal: 16:01

I'm so mu so musically challenged that I, I probably...

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 16:04

So that's a big, big, big, big pop hit. Your viewers probably know that, but they're called the nine days band. And so I have a song, a hit on that hit album. I have a song on that album called two hearts, too big. I have songs that have been in commercials and they've been national campaign ads for things like the boot barn, which is a big Western wear place. I've had I've written things for spots for brotherhood outdoors, like, you know, for sports unions and stuff like that. I've done. Gosh, I can't even think about lots of movies, lots of films, things on Netflix, stuff like that.

George Siegal: 16:39

So that's awesome. Now, a as you get your message out, as you're trying to get your book out in front of people, what's the, what reaction are you getting? And what are you hearing when people get, hear your message?

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 16:50

So so far, and I was really nervous honestly about this. And I think the biggest reason, I was a little nervous about putting my book out with that title, God gratitude and giving is I was like, oh my gosh, people are gonna come for me because I have God in the title. You know? So I was really nervous about that. To be honest with you, but I immediately started getting some incredible reviews and I think the highest compliment that I actually got from people who knew me said, Melissa felt like I was having a conversation with you. There were times that I laughed. There were times that I was emotional. And so I never expected, you know, someone to say it felt like they were having a conversation with me. So that was really neat. My book, by the way, is a very easy read. I call it like a coffee table book. Like you can read my book in an hour on a plane ride in an hour. I mean, it's a really easy read. And so that's been. I that's been good. I guess that's been good. I was a little nervous about that first. I'm like, wow. My book is not this thick, but turns out people have loved it. I include journal pages in there for people to sort of, cuz I know me every time I'm reading a book, I end up writing things on the side of the book and wishing I had room that type of thing. And then my book did go. It was only for a day, about a day, maybe a day and a half. It did go to number one in spiritual healing on Amazon Kindle. And that was a big surprise. And I, I was a big ball of tears when that happened.

George Siegal: 18:17

I bet. No, that's exciting. It's, it's hard to write a book. It's hard to get people to read a book. Yeah. It's hard to do a podcast. There's so many things that are out there in the world that, to do anything first, you're putting yourself out there. There's always the risk that you're throwing a party that nobody wants to come to. You know, you, you you've done this and nobody wants to consume it. Yeah. So have you had anybody come at you that says they don't like it that have you heard anything about them saying, ah, it's just another religious thing. I'm not into that. What are you trying to push on this?

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 18:45

Not at all. I've actually had been on a few I got a few TV spots and interviews and stuff like that. And everything's been really, really positive. Except the other day I go to my Amazon. I have all five stars and this is kind of funny and silly, but I'll just say it. Somebody gave me a one star, they put their name and they didn't comment anything, but, and I don't ever engage in this social media political stuff, but ironically. Ironically that day. Somebody said something that got a little bit under my sleeve. I made a comment, they commented back something about me. They didn't know me at all. They commented something back about me, my business and my book. And then funny enough. Later that day, a one star popped up and I thought, how petty, and, but that's the world we're kind of living in. Right. So I wanted to be upset about that, cuz I think if you're gonna have the courage to go and do that, but not leave your name or so anyway, that's. Anonymous negativity from a one star, but probably not even worth mentioning, but no, mostly I have gotten a lot of good, good, real good feedback.

George Siegal: 20:01

So I think it's good every now and then when that happens, though, because then people look at your reviews and they go, all right, there's it. It's not all friends and family. I mean, there's somebody out there that, that took the time to dislike you and you not every not, everybody's gonna love everything. You gotta have a thick skin. I'm sure to put anything out there.

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 20:18

Don't they say, George, like you're not, if you don't have a hater yet, or you don't have somebody talk and smack about you, what are you doing? You're not putting yourself out there.

George Siegal: 20:26

Exactly. I mean the most they do that mean tweets thing. I see a lot on TikTok and other things where people say the most awful things to celebrities and that that's the downside of social media. People actually think someone cares about what they have to say. And they're able to get it out to a lot of people. So it's it's a different world. I mean, it really is kinda crazy.

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 20:45

It's different world and on a very serious note, I mean, I'm laughing about that stuff, but I'm just, again, I'll use that word not to be too super quirky, but you know, when I really think about I guess, I guess it hits me sometimes if I happen to catch something on a nature channel that says, oh, we've discovered this skeleton. And we think it's 440 million years old. Right in that moment, I think to myself we are here for such a short smidgen. I want to make sure every day of my life, every person I engage with, I leave something good behind. And I mean that with my whole heart. So when I think about the opportunities, we have to say something kind to make a difference and people do that stuff. And I see it. I just think it's unfortunate. I mean, I'm not the tweet police and I'm not the, you know, God gratitude giving police, but I just think it's a waste. And I know personally from experience what comes back into your life, you know, just depending on what you, what you put out, it's pretty tremendous.

George Siegal: 21:48

Yeah, no, it's true. I, I always tell my kids just because you think it doesn't mean you have to say it. Sometimes it's good to let a little time go. And, you know, you cool off and, and don't end up having to say anything. Now you were kind enough to send me a couple of your songs. I wanna listen to a little bit of Sweet Honesty and then ask you a couple questions.

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 22:05

Absolutely. Mama worked the, that shift as a waitress in a bar reason, raising three kids on the money from tips must have been pretty hard. We were poor I didn't know it was when I came home each day, small gifts on my pillow that said, I love you a million ways. Outta all the things I treasure. One still means the most to me. When I'm feeling down I go back to an afternoon. Close my eyes and hold on tight to the scent of that pefume. Love all the precious gift she ever gave to me was a little pink bottle of sweet honesty.

George Siegal: 23:09

So that sounds like a great song. I mean, I, I, I could tell a lot of work went into it. What was the motivation behind sweet honesty?

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 23:17

Well, it's a hundred percent true story. So when I was a little girl, my mom, oh gosh, you know what? She was just a waitress. There were three of us. We were poor. I just didn't know it. And I mean that my mom always kept the house really clean. I feel like I came home from school every day. There was a pack of M and Ms. There was piece of gum, something on my bed. My bed was freshly made. I just had such a great mom and one of the very last gifts that she gave me before she died was a little pink bottle of sweet honesty perfume that Avon still carries. And so when I was little that perfume and to this day, when I would smell that perfume, I could close my eyes and I would be right there, close to my mother. And. I had just been wanting, it was just one of the songs I wanted to write and talk about, you know, at some point when I got to Nashville and there's a funny, a really cool story about this song and my co-writer, so I pretty much wrote the song, but in terms of some of the production and a little bit of the melody and stuff, I partnered with a guy named Buck Johnson. Now you might not know who that is, but you definitely know who Aerosmith is. And he, the keyboard player for Aerosmith and Buck Johnson is just an incredible human being. And one night I'd heard him singing out at one of the hotels here in Nashville, cuz you know, it's like Vegas, there's music everywhere, everywhere you go. Every hotel, every restaurant, whatever. So and he was friends with another friend of mine and I met him and he is just such an incredible human being, but I loved his voice. It reminded me so much of Don Henley and I had. I guess this kind of goes back to your earlier first question. I'd always had this dream that if I could do a duet, I wanted to sing with Don Hinley, cuz I loved his voice so much. Well Buck Johnson. If I close my eyes, I thought that Don Henley was in the room. So, and I knew he was a great producer. He's certainly an incredible keyboard player. So I was lucky enough to get in his studio and he worked with sweet honesty on me and he added all his harmonies. So I kind of got my dream there.

George Siegal: 25:29

Nice.

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 25:30

Yeah. So that's a really cool story. I'm honored and that's the only song that he and I have ever collaborated on. But that is a very personal story, a very personal song. And so that's, I, that's why I wrote it.

George Siegal: 25:44

Now, when you put your emotions into a song like that and, and put it out there are, is it for people to listen to, and maybe think about what you were thinking about or invoke their own emotions of something that mattered to them when at some point in their life?

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 25:58

Yeah, I think so. You know, maybe, maybe twofold, but I, I think so I'm probably gonna trip this up, you know, or be un articulate when I say this, but of our senses from what I understand about smell is the only one that doesn't have to travel, you know, neuro passage, different passage, ways to get straight to the brain. So a lot of us, I think maybe, maybe hearing that song of mine might go, oh, you know, I do smell this. It reminds me of my grandmother's house or, you know, somebody I dated or, or something so that that's so, you know, always in songwriting and always in songs, the whole thing is there's a lot of times where you are telling a story that is, you know, the details of it might be a little personal, but typically what you want is the universal message to come across. And so the universal message in that song, I would hope that most people would take from that is yes. That it would spark a memory of some kind that they have, that's connected to a scent or something in their life, you know, cause sometimes we don't even know it until our brains are such incredible, incredible machines. You know, you could smell something, you're not even thinking about it, but you. Oh, that reminds me of this and it takes you right back to that place. For me, I happen to just be connected to that, that clone, and it just is a very peaceful place for me, you know, I still have.

George Siegal: 27:16

So let's, let's listen to a little bit of this other song that you sent me called Ballerina, and then we can talk about this. So here we go.

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 27:24

Ballerina, your beauty is beyond compare. I used to dream that I was you as a little girl. I leaned on these dreams in all the major falls. I learned to heal my heart in times of minor falls. Ballerina.

George Siegal: 28:08

All right. You were two for two in my book. I mean, sometimes if I'm hearing something and I'm not, you know, I'm not just sucking up to you cuz you're a guest. I mean, I legitimately enjoyed listening to this one as well. Where were you where were you when you were writing this? What were, what were you trying to get across?

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 28:20

So one day I just sat down and I started thinking about, so there was this. All right. So there . So when I was a child and I'll, I'll say this again, I was a very happy little girl. This was all before my mom died. You know, she was a single mom, but she was a great mom and I was a very happy little girl. So I was more of like a punky booster kind of kid, you know, and. My ponytails would be a little uneven. My mom didn't have the best vision and I'd go to school with braids uneven or whatever, but, and maybe have a plaid skirt on with a flowered shirt and some red, you know, tennis shoes. But I was as happy as I could be, but there were those girls in my classroom that were just as pretty is a ballerina with their stockings and their flowy dresses and their shiny shoes. And there was one such girl, her name was Dolores. And I just thought she was the prettiest thing I had ever seen. And she'd come to school every day with her little patent leather shoes on, you know, and so I remembered her and I remembered as a little girl that I would think, oh, I bet I bet you she's a ballerina too. And I don't know why I made that up in my head, but, you know, so while I was going home and teaching my friends how to do the car wash. You know, I imagine she was going home and she was taking ballet lessons and stuff, so never forgot Dolores. And one day I was just sitting on my couch, you know, maybe after I'd been writing all day with artists and I just, this was a song that I wanted to out there because the message of it was, you know, I describe a ballerina. And, you know, say things in the song like you, you know, how do you dance like that? Like, you don't have a care in this world, but what I wanted to get around to was, and, and there's a section in the song that says, you know, maybe we're all stars that fell from the sky because I've, I've w watched you search for home in your eyes ballerina. And what I was trying to say is, you know, we all lean on things to get through things that we go through in life. And for me, I leaned on guitar strings and keyboard keys, and that's what that's about. You know, I talk about how I healed my heart in minor fours and I'm alluding to chords and minor chords and stuff. And. What's come outta that's been pretty phenomenal. The very first time I played that at a show here in Nashville at the listening room cafe, I much to my surprise, it was a line of people, mostly girls and women who were lined up to talk to me afterwards. Some of them told me some very personal stories, told me that they danced their entire life to get away from abuse that they had suffered. Some of 'em were just little girls that wanted to tell me that they had just become a ballerina. And so the power of music, it just goes on and on and on and on. And I had a father come up to me and say, well, my daughter's not here, but I'd like to get a copy of that song for her. You know, her whole life is about ballet. And then an artist friend of mine asked me if he could send it to his sister in, I can't remember what state it was, but she runs a chain of ballet schools. And so from my understanding, they play my song in all the ballet schools. So that's pretty neat.

George Siegal: 31:34

Oh, that is now with social media and the way it's, it's possible to find people. Did you ever try to track down Dolores?

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 31:42

I don't know her last name. Oh yeah. That makes it tough. Yeah. And I don't know that I could recognize her cuz I was literally like second grade. Okay. That's cool pictures and I'm sure it is possible. Yeah, I'm sure that it is possible, especially with social media. Be interesting to see what, where she is in her life today. I mean, I I'm sure it's something fantastic.

George Siegal: 32:05

All right. So as I look at what we've talked about, and, you know, the theme of my podcast is people that have recognized a problem and are doing something to make it better. It sounds like that's what you definitely do with, with your life, your book, your music, what advice would you have for other people who have that same dream, or they have an idea or a thought but they're just not getting off the bench. They're just not doing it yet. What would you say to inspire them to take a chance and go for it?

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 32:30

I would say this. One life. Just one. Why are you not running like you're on fire chasing after your wildest dreams. That's what I would say. Why are you not running like you're on fire because it's not a dress rehearsal. it's just not. And statistically, we get 78.8 years statistically. And it does go by fast and I feel like the only way to fail is to quit if you quit because you want to quit, that's fine. But if you quit because you feel like you you're just never gonna get there. Now then that's the only, that's the only way to fail, you know, is a lot of it is mindset, George. It really is. I mean, I, I don't know. I've been accused of having two rose colored glasses and I'm fine with that. I'm fine with that accuse me of that all day long. I don't care. I live in my melissa bubble, where I believe in goodness in this world, I know there's tragedy and I know there are tragic things and I, and, and believe me, I'm quite empath. I mean, when you're creative and you feel, and you write, you know, it can be quite the curse. When I hear about things that are going on or even, you know, watching the political climate that we're in, I have a lot of fear for America and what's to come or just, I just feel just a lot of sadness over people, making decisions or fighting with strangers that they don't even know. We're all the same. You know, we just, we could all walk up to this great big window, look out of it and see something completely different. And that's okay. I mean, we have to understand that we're not, you know, we don't all wake up and have the same thing for breakfast every day.

George Siegal: 34:31

Now there's far worse things somebody could say about you then that you're looking at the world through rose colored glasses. I mean, that's I think that's a positive energy that you should be applauded for. Not nobody should have a problem with that. Now you were, you were go ahead.

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 34:44

People come along and knocked you off your bike. I get knocked off my bike. It's like, and I don't like it cause I don't see it coming or whatever, but you know what? I just pick my bike up, shame on you. And I keep going.

George Siegal: 34:55

Good for you. Yeah. That that's all you can really do. Now. You gave me a lot of social media ways people can follow you and consume you. How can people get the book? And what's the best way to follow you. This will all be in the show notes, but if you just wanna mention it.

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 35:08

Yeah. So just about everything and, and when Your podcast as well. This podcast will be up on my Melissa Bollea Rowe.com. You can find out pretty much everything about me, my business, the musical I wrote my book, my books. You can get an autograph copy from my website, but if you also for your convenience, wanna go to Amazon, I have it in paperback. Hard. Copy. And on Kindle on Amazon, so you can get, and I did a deal with Amazon. They locked me in for a couple of months, so and they've been good to me, but after that it'll be available at Barnes& Noble and target and things like that. But right now, Amazon.

George Siegal: 35:45

We could do a whole show on you saying they've been good to you? Not a, not a fan. I mean, I buy a lot of stuff from them, but I, I miss the days of when the local businesses had a chance.

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 35:54

I know, I know. And, and so that, that is really hard. You know, for all of us, it is hard, right. To just roll with technology. But also just wish that we could hold on to some of the good stuff from the past. Trust me. I, I feel, I feel what you're saying.

George Siegal: 36:12

Absolutely. Well, listen Melissa, all the, all your contacts and all the, the, how people come by the book, the link will all be in the show notes. Thank you for coming on today. I, I appreciate your time and I look forward to following you now, especially looking for your music.

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 36:25

Thank you so much. I do have a question for you?

George Siegal: 36:28

Go for it. What's that?

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 36:29

What's on your shirt?

George Siegal: 36:31

This is, it says move the world films.

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 36:34

Oh, okay. I couldn't see it the whole time. Yeah. I can only see part of it. I love that. Okay.

George Siegal: 36:39

My dad, my dad had this expression when I was growing up. He said, give me a, it was Arcamedes. Give me a lever big enough and I can move the world. So I, I thought that in my head about, okay, big lever, trying to move the world just a little bit and, and came up with this with this logo for my film company.

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 36:56

Well, you did great. And of course I've seen that, so I should have known that was your logo cause I've seen it, but the whole time the shirt's been partially down. There you go. So I couldn't quite tell what it was in there. I see it. Wonderful.

George Siegal: 37:07

The downside of zoom is getting this right shot so you can show everything, you know, you want the stuff in the background, the stuff in the foreground, but thank you for noticing. I appreciate it.

Melissa Bollea Rowe: 37:15

Yeah, you're welcome. And good, good job. I mean, I'm really impressed with everything you're doing and I'm just honored that you would. I. I'll leave you with this because it's sincerely how I feel. I think the most valuable thing we can give to somebody is our time. And so I really thank you for giving me your time and giving me a platform to talk about all these things.

George Siegal: 37:35

My pleasure. Thanks. Thank you for listening to today's Tell Us How to Make It Better podcast. If you wanna get more information about Melissa, all the ways to get in touch with her and to get her book are in the show notes. And if you have any questions for me, guests for upcoming episodes, there's a contact form in the show notes, and you can shoot me your suggestions. Talk about things you've liked or not liked or things you'd like to see coming up in the future. Thanks again for listening. See you next time.